Just six months ago, my inner fitness goddess was a badass, tattoo embellished, hair in the wind chick on a Harley with oodles of goals and plenty of places to go. That girl was smoking hot and unstoppable. So she thought. Everything changed when her Harley ran out of gas and she’d maxed out the mojo funds going too fast, too soon. Now, she’s slowly trucking along in her 1971 baby blue Ford Pinto, still moving forward, but riding down a completely different path this time. And that’s okay. It’s all part of the journey.
I’ve been away from the blog and YouTube community for a few months now, but I’m still hanging around. I have no plans of giving up on my fitness and weight loss goals anytime soon. I just a hit a few bumps in the road and it took a little while to get back up. And that’s not necessarily a bad thing. Sometimes you need to fall flat on your ass before you realize exactly what you’ve been doing wrong or need to improve on. Some sabotagers are obvious like eating an extra bowl of pasta after dinner or eating out three or four times throughout the week instead of bringing your own lunch to work, but there are those other buggers that don’t show up so easily under the flood lights or even a microscope. I call my invisible buggers denial and anxiety.
Sometimes there are events in your life that shake you to the core, that wake up old demons and memories that you thought you’d conquered and killed off years ago. What I’m beginning to understand is that if you don’t face them, truly confront them as oppose to going around them, they’ll follow you through every aspect of your life. Many of us struggle with them a lot throughout our weight loss journeys and if they don’t show up in the form of self-deprecation, screaming fits, depression, or something else, it’s sure enough going to show up on the scale.
With that said, enough with the sad stuff. It’s a new year, new day, new second. We’ve got to make the best of it, right? I decided that I could care less about new year’s resolutions this time around. I’ve planned, plotted, diagrammed, and app-ed (Is that even a word?) my way through the first part of my journey and in the end it drove me crazy. I’m opting to JUST DO IT this year and to get back on that Harley once again, but this time I’m letting my body tell me what it needs. If it’s telling me that it’s tired at 9:30 p.m., then I’m taking my booty to bed instead of forcing it to stay up until midnight simply because I’ve convinced myself that adults don’t go to bed before 11 o’clock. On second thought, maybe that is exactly what “responsible” adults do. If my body’s craving a little sweetness, I’ll give it to her, but in a smaller bowl or maybe even just a spoonful. Sounds like a good idea, but we’ll have to see how that goes. More importantly, when I feel the stress coming on, I have to figure out a healthier way to deal with it instead of bottling it up and using food to cope. Honestly, for me, that’s what I want to focus on more than anything this year. Creating a healthier me from the inside out. I know how to lose weight, workout, and make banging green juice, I just have to learn how not to let the emotional stuff make me feel like I don’t deserve to have or keep that kind of success.
So there, Folks, you have it. My introduction back into the blogging community. As always, I wish you all the best with your weight loss and fitness goals.